Today is Saturday, July 22, 2017

Magic Man

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Because of this, I'm forced to watch one of the many David Blaine specials Brody has Tivo'd, that have somehow made it passed the parental lock.


Magic - I doubt it. More like a conspiracy.


One of the most maddening things to me about David Blaine is having my family watch his shows, because they are constantly calling out to me to watch with them. To which I always respond...


"It's not real!! Leave me alone I don't want to watch him."


Claiming David Blaine is not magical is an unspeakable truth that my family hates to hear.


"Mama, you got to watch! He just told this lady to pick a number between 50 and 100, but use even numbers for each digit, but use different digits and he picked 68 and that's what it was!!!"


At which point I roll my eyes and go back to washing dishes...where my magic happens.


See, now they're dirty, now they're not!


Considering the right answer to Magic Man's little card trick could only be 62, 64, 68, 82, 84, 86, ...I'm thinking Mr. Magic has somehow figured out how to pick the one number in six that a person might choose. 


Not that impressive to warrant a prime time special, if you ask me.


"Come in here! He just asked a woman to pick a color in her mind and then the name of the color she picked all of a sudden appeared written in front of her! Quick! You need to watch this!"


For some reason it bothers me the most when Brody calls out to me.


"Seriously, you can't think that stuff is real!"


To which my husband always answers with "I wouldn't be doubting David Blaine if I were you," in quite a threatening tone I might add.


Needless to say, I don't care for Mr. Blaine and all his fakery!


So as I sit here watching his latest special, that includes a roster of famous people as gullible as my own clan, I'm prepared to be unimpressed.


First I watch him put an ice pick through his hand (sans blood) while all the stars squirm and squeal!


Parlor trick if ever I've seen one!


Then he proceeds to have one star close their eyes and he pokes the other in their shoulder. Somehow the one with their eyes closed, thinks they've been poked.


Ok, so that's kind of odd. Yet, not magic by any stretch.


I must say, however, that when he asks Harrison Ford to pick a card out of a deck and that exact card is later found in an orange they cut ...well I don't know what is more freaky - watching that happen right before my eyes or watching Indiana Jones almost lose it!


So, is he magic? I don't know. But I do know the next time Brody calls out to me to watch Magic Man, I'm going to make a beeline for the television and let one of our kids do the dishes.


And when those dishes are done without my slight of hand...well, that will be the day David Blaine really impresses me with some magic.


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